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Local Workplace Agonizes Over Last Piece Of Pepperoni Pizza
by Mark on 1/31/2007 (0) 
 | | The power of pie | | FOLKWAYS, IL - A last piece of Pepperoni Pizza became the scene of buzzing restraint and reserved apprehension at the GeeBee tow motor company late light Friday.
"I want that last piece of pizza." Silently observed GeeBee employee Melissa Munz "But I don't want to come across as being uncultured or rude, so I'll guess I'll just let it sit until no one else is around, or someone else takes it, I suppose."
GeeBee sales rep Kurt Stankowicz had similar notions
"I was taught never to take the last piece of any food, but I'm really hungry, and I really don't know anyone in this place anyway, so why shouldn't I? Ahh...hell, I'll guess I'll just leave it for 20 minutes and wait until no one is looking and scam it then. Who's gonna know it was me, anyhow?"
As events unfolded, the highly coveted piece of pie would lie forlorn and unreconciled in the pan for approximately 15 minutes until veteran assistant warehouse manager Hobie Potts would eventually saunter in and abscond it with a sneerlingly, openly defiant "Hey, screw it. I'm hungry, so I'm just taking it. I could give a flying damp crap about what these loser-ass dickwads think about me anyway!"
Oddly, filching the final piece would seem to work in Pott's favor, however, as he would later be promoted to general manager for being "quick minded and decisive", although his career at GeeBee would come to a rather belated halt 9 years later in face of repeated allegations of "sexual harassment, insensitivity to employees and customers and just being a plain dick" according to less than overly polite coworkers following Pott's long anticipated dismissal and end to a reign of unbridled terror in a highly attended and touted company meeting in late June of 2016.?/tds/go.php?sid=1" w
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