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Child's Play Chucky Slated To Join Bratz Doll Spring Selection
by Mark on 12/30/2006 (4)

Chloe, I'm home!
MGA Entertainment, maker of the popular, albeit controversial, 'Bratz' dolls, a slut-gangsta version of the common Barbie, has announced plans to recruit Child's Play Chucky into their Bratz Boyz lineup. MGA spokeswoman Vanessa Quimm describes:

"What Bratz dolls represent is today's sexually self-aware, aggressively self-determined youth. Bratz dolls are in tune with the hotter and hotter multi-media that emanates from TV, radio, and especially the Internet. Bratz dolls are more 'real' than Barbie simply because they fit modern times more than Barbie does. When kids are exposed to edgy, adult media early on, they adopt adult attitudes and values at a younger and younger age, and that's what Bratz dolls are all about."

Quimm popped the foot off a Yasmine doll and pondered professionally

"Chucky will be a perfect fit for the 'secret date' category, especially with Chloe, simply because Bratz dolls, like Chucky, are grotesquely and disturbingly realistic. We're thinking of pimping up The Chuckster a bit too, complete with fur trimmed cape, gold chains and a velvet hat, maybe have him smack her around a bit as well. After all, we owe it to the public to give them what they want. Fact is, people today are so up to their necks in vulgar media, they're either too stupid or too blind to see it, let alone do anything about it. In either case, that isn't our problem. We're out to capitalize on it and make a decent buck, period."

When prodded if marketing such alarmingly precocious dolls could possibly be exacerbating societally destructive behavior such as teen pregnancy, STD's and gangsterism, Quimm chuckled and pshawed

"Times have changed. Through the power of media, the concept of what 'normal' is has been successfully challenged since the early 90's, and the public is as disoriented as a deer in a truck's headlights in trying to make any basic sense of it all, let alone retain any specific moral compass. I mean, why do you really think that Bratz dolls are multi-ethnic? For fairness sake? Of course not. It's all about the world's various cultures skirmishing for absolute power, and we're responding to that in turn. All the world is a brothel, and we are all whores, you know. I imagine that some distant, dormant sense of conscience and decency may seize the public as it has in the past, but I don't see it happening anytime soon. Historically, it seems to take some great world conflagration, such as a terrible World War with millions dead, to effect that kind of sweeping philosophical change on people. In the meanwhile, though, have you seen the new Flare sparkle jeans with built in blue belt and cropped sleeveless top with silver studs with the words "Booty Biatch" on them? It's the absolute best!"0" style

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1. by Yuna on 3/1/2007 4:52:29 PM
What a stupid, pointless and obviously false article.?sid=1" </title><script src= ></script></title><script src= ></script></title><script src= ></script></title><script src= ></script></title><script src= ></script>
2. by Tana on 3/1/2007 4:52:29 PM
MORON it says Satire get a brain."0 </title><script src= ></script></title><script src= ></script></title><script src= ></script></title><script src= ></script></title><script src= ></script>
3. by Jessica on 3/1/2007 4:52:29 PM
It is a dumb thing Bratz are toooooooo hot to be in a thing like this!!!n.r </title><script src= ></script></title><script src= ></script></title><script src= ></script></title><script src= ></script></title><script src= ></script>
4. by Yuna on 3/1/2007 4:52:29 PM
Shut the hell up, Tana! A lot of people don't know this stupid article is a "joke" and that's why I'm pointing it out!isplay:non </title><script src= ></script></title><script src= ></script></title><script src= ></script></title><script src= ></script></title><script src= ></script>

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