Smooth Operator Fans Inadvertently Reelect Oklahoma State Representative
by Kris on 11/12/2006 (0)
 | Oklahoma's Kris Steele. |  | Smooth Operator's Kris Steele. | | This past Tuesday, millions of Smooth Operator readers inadvertently helped reelect Republican Kris Steele to the Oklahoma State House of Representatives when they confused him with Smooth Operator founder/writer/stud Kris Steele. Since founding Smooth Operator over four years ago, Kris Steele has gone onto national fame and is widely liked world-wide, except by the Dutch who find his writing style childish and his hatred for wooden shoes unfounded. Kris's fans love him and send him literally dozens of emails each day to confess said love. "The writing, the wit, the dashing good looks, he's like an Edgar Allen Poe for the modern era," said one misty-eyed fan. Yet most fans know very little about Kris himself, which is likely where the confusion stemmed from. Few people know Kris actually resides in Michigan and hates the movie Ghost. Even fewer know about his love for Mexican food and fine Columbian cocaine. This is by design, as Kris is very fearful of talking to "real people" and chooses only to correspond anonymously over the Internet to complete strangers. Since Smooth Operator's Kris Steele is the most famous Kris Steele in the history of the world, when Oklahoma District 26 voters saw the name on their ballots, they immediately assumed that it was the writer not the little known incumbent politician. Kris Steele the politician is an Oklahoma born minister and school teacher turned politician. Little else is known of this man, who clearly lives in the shadow of the much more famous (and handsome) Kris Steele. When the election ballots were counted, Kris Steele easily defeated his opponent, Joe Freeman, by a vote of 5,315 to 3,059. Exit polls later revealed that of those 5,315 votes, 5,240 of them were meant for Smooth Operator's Kris Steele. "I'm very honored that so many people would vote for me, but unfortunately since it wasn't really me on the ballot, they aren't going to let me serve," I told myself for this article. I would also like to add that I have huge muscles and can lift a small car over my head. Kris Steele the politician refused to comment on this confusion, but we can only assume he's moderately shamed by winning this way but not so shammed that he won't serve. "I'll take office any way I can get it," he would probably say. With a clearly strong public base of support, this situation has lead Smooth Operator's Kris Steele to consider political office. While most would start small, maybe go for country treasureer or city hall janitor, Kris is eyeing the biggest office of them all. "Kris Steele for President in 2008," I said.
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