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Actor Mike Farrell Wins All Time Dick-Head Award
by Mark on 8/5/2006 (0)

Artist's print "dick-head portrait in purple", serial# 4077
HOLLYWOOD - The National Dick-Head Society recently named former MASH star Mike Farrell "top dick-head of all time" according to NDHS chairman Brent Huntley.

"Farrell wins hands down for two crucial reasons. First, for his terse, controlling, highly opinionated caustic portrayal of B.J. Honeycutt in the MASH series, and second for his real life liberal Hollywood antics in defending vicious thugs and cold blooded murderers slated for execution, notably, and most recently, Stanley "Tookie" Williams in December of last year. Farrell irritates and strangulates in so many dickish ways, on the screen and in real life, his revolting persona is almost without dickish precedent. Mike's a dick to end all dicks, a dick for the ages, to say the least."

Other notable runner ups included New York Yankees owner George Steinbrenner, late former president Richard Nixon, feminist/actress "Hanoi" Jane Fonda, and TV evangelist Pat Robertson.

"It's of poignant interest to note that 'dick-head' is a somewhat subjective term, and is often misused. Our interpretation of a true dick-head is one who knowingly tries to force their will and belief system on others for little more than sheer vanity, the mad urge to control, or just for simple financial gain. Dick Cheney may be a dick-head to some, and Hillary Clinton to another, often in contra-opposed political ranks. In such cases, the title is merely used in a derogatory fashion, and is thus rendered invalid."

Huntley plans to present Farrell with his award, a gold plated copy of Jimmy Buffett's classic hit single "Dickhead", but admits getting him to accept it may prove difficult, citing "dick-heads don't see themselves as such. If you can get a guy like Farrell just to admit that he may have said or done something stupid or wrong, you pretty much banged the gong."

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