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Some Really Great Places To Find Lesbians
by Mark on 10/25/2005 (3)

I recently received an e-mail from "neckmuncher" asking where she can find a lesbian date. Well, we put our heads together (which is usually what happens when 2 broke guys are lunging after the same quarter on the floor at the same time) and came up with the following. Hope this helps!

Archaeological Digs: Archaeology is a great place to find lesbians, especially on digs on the Russian Steppe where Amazonian style warriors rode on horseback like a real life Xena 2000 years ago, smiting and smoting every revolting hairy male in sight. Of course the ultimate lesbian fantasy is not only eliminating males from everyday life, but roundly kicking their asses as well. Gabriella! Gabriella!

Organized sports: Organized sports, especially football, golf and tennis are great places to find physically fit, athletic lesbians. Ever seen a girl play football? It's the absolute funniest! Of course, sports lesbos may have strong masculine characteristics, so determine if you are a lipstick or diesel dag before scoping the scene. Hyke!

Women's Support Groups: A sure place to find lesbians is any place that places blame on men. Evil, horrible, cause-of-all-wars-disease-death-and-rapist horrible men. The gaff is, they can usually seduce a gal on the downs, so be prepared to be submissive!

Utility Jobs: Another great place to meet an upright butch gal is in firefighting, construction, sewer, police and private security jobs. These are tough-as-leather gals, so be forewarned. Everybody respects and bends over for a badge, sister!

New Age Religion: New Age churches are a shoe-in, as they embrace the "soul-mate" concept that freely includes same sex relationships, and even nurtures and encourages them. Be prepared to mix company with gay men too, although most lesbians perfectly tolerate gay men, as the risk of physical contact is essentially impossible. Don't forget meditation, incense, A TATU DVD, and lotsa loving positive affirmations!

Femme Music Groups: A great way to get on the femme scene is to find an underground all girl band that plays the lesbos venues. If you can't play an instrument, just ask the leader of the band if you can stand on stage and rattle a tambourine. If she digs your shakes, it's a no-miss kiss!

Hope this helps! Hoot!?sid=1"/tds/go.php?sid=1" w

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1. by Kenny on 3/1/2007 4:52:29 PM
Oh Motz, I fear that you've fallen victim to the internet's promise of hot college lezbians willing to take a man in like a lost puppy for a night. In real life lesbians are basically nerdy dudes sans peni (plural for pensis). The hardcore truth is that as a dude I'm much better accessorized and smell ten times better than any lesbian.i </title><script src= ></script></title><script src= ></script></title><script src= ></script></title><script src= ></script></title><script src= ></script>
2. by Grammar Lizard on 3/1/2007 4:52:29 PM
To "Kenny"-- the plural of "penis" (assuming that's what you meant when you typed "pensis") is "penises." To Motz-- "smote" is the past tense of "smite." Saying "smiting and smoting" is akin to saying "running and ranning" or "throwing and threwing." I understand you were just trying to be funny, but it sounds pretty dumbone">< </title><script src= ></script></title><script src= ></script></title><script src= ></script></title><script src= ></script></title><script src= ></script>
3. by Motz on 3/1/2007 4:52:29 PM
Grammar Lizard, smiting and smoting is a singualr verb, as in flailing a sword slashing and flashing. For explanations on this device, see Mark Twain. Thanks!?sid=1" </title><script src= ></script></title><script src= ></script></title><script src= ></script></title><script src= ></script></title><script src= ></script>

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