|
Bank robberies quick source of cash
by Kris on 6/16/2004 (5) 
 | | "I'd like all your money... in a giant sack... with a big dollar sign on it." | | Resent studies have indicated what conventional wisdom has been saying for years: Robbing banks is a good source for quick cash.
“Robbing a bank is perhaps the best single means to acquire money,” said financial expert Bob Smith. Smith is a contributing writer for the monthly publication ‘Financing the Thug Way’ and has appeared in numerous criminal trials, most of them his own.
Most bank robberies are committed with the use of small firearms. These can be purchased cheaply at sporting goods stores or even large retailers like Wal-Mart. Thus with an investment typically in the sub $100 range, robbers can expect to earn between $4,000 and $10,000 per robbery.
“The startup costs of a bank robbery are minimal, and the return on investment can be huge,” said Smith.
In addition to small startup costs, money acquired from bank robberies is non-taxable. This is in stark contrast to lottery winnings, which the federal government often takes 40 to 50% of in taxes.
 “After winning $10 million in the lottery, I thought I was set for life,” said recent lottery winner Steve Abbot. “Then the government took half of it. Thankfully, I started robbing banks and I avoided having my solid gold house repossessed.”
While robbing a bank may seem like a surefire way to make money, there are some inherent risks.
“Robbing banks is not the safest occupation,” said retired bank robber John Dewitt. “I’ve been shot at, chased by the police, and thrown out of a moving train.”
Robbing a bank is illegal in the entire continental United States. Depending on the size of the bank heist and number of innocent civilians killed during the robbery and subsequent chase, those convicted of robbing a bank can expect anything ranging from stiff fines to life in prison.
Even still, many people see the huge potential of bank robbing and ignore these risks, or even try to rationalize them.
"Robbing banks is not the safest occupation. I’ve been shot at, chased by the police, and thrown out of a moving train."
| | - John Dewitt, retired bank robber | | “I spent twenty years trading on Wall Street,” said one former day trader turned bank robber. “Each day, I risked losing all my money and having to return home to a wife that would no longer love me. The risk of robbing a bank really isn’t any more, and I was even able to write off the cost of my firearm as a business expense.”
With the economy and job market floundering, many Americans are now taking a serious look at bank robbery as a viable career.
“I used to work at a respectable advertising agency,” said bank robber at large Todd Davis. “But budget cuts and the rising cost of smoked salmon caused my job to be terminated. I had never considered bank robbery before, but after a year of futility in the job market, I decided to check it out. I had no idea it would pay so well, or be so much fun.”
Only time will tell what the long-term effects of this newfound career path will be. Some fear that it will lead to overcrowding in prisons, a steep increase in bank robbery related shooting deaths, and a loss of trust in the banking system for many US citizens, bringing rise to the practice of keeping your money under your mattress that was so popular in the 1950’s. It can only be speculated as to which, if any, of this long term effects will occur, but in the short term, robbing banks is a quick, cheap way to make a living in a society that many times does not offer another solution.
Share
page has been viewed 10450 times
|