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Random Thoughts III
by Kris on 4/22/2003 (2)

Like many other people from across the galaxy, I often sit around and ponder the intricacies of life itself. Some of these thoughts may be deep or thought provoking, most won't be. Below are some such thoughts from the deep, dark recesses of my mind. While some may seem crude, there is a grain of truth hidden deep inside the caramel center of these spicy pieces of cream pie.

You buy a man to fish and he eats for a day. You teach a man to build a fish and he controls the oceans with an army of robotic fish.

I think I could beat a goat in a fight, unless it was really pissed off.

If they made a video game about my life, it would be almost a mirror image of Space Invaders.

I used to be afraid of the dark when I was younger but now I realize that it isn't the dark that I should fear but instead the vampires that hide in the dark.

Cardboard is good for making boxes, but it makes terrible shingles. It also makes terrible boats and construction scaffolding.

I'm not as scared of dolphins as most people are scared of Eskimos.

American Idol may be on television, but I still refuse to watch it.

The idea behind the game "Duck Duck Goose" just seems absurd to me, and insulting to ducks.

I don't know what Barbie sees in Ken. He seems like a tool to me.

Space would be nice if it wasn't for all the aliens.

If I ever meet Satan, I'm going to ask him what is up with that pitchfork he always carries around. Is he supposed to be some sort of evil farmer?

I would like to use the word "Thrice" more often in day to day conversation.

While lions may be the "King of the Jungle", I doubt they are very good at go-kart racing.

I think wooden cars would be a great idea. They would be able to float in water and whenever they got old, you could just abandon them since they would be totally biodegradable. Unfortunately though, the only drawback of wooden cars would be the many beavers they would attract and a tendency to randomly explode.

As much as I dislike the Backstreet Boys, I'd much rather listen to their music than be stoned to death.

I find alot of activities enjoyable, and other activities not enjoyable. Seldom do I find an activity that is both.

When people "pirate" music, they feel like they are acting out childhood dreams of being a pirate, sailing the seven seas, pillaging and plundering, colleting assorted booty, and being chased by alligators with alarm clocks in their stomachs. If the music industry really wants to turn people away from pirating music, they need to change the term "pirate" to something less exciting, like Ben Stein. No one is going to willingly Ben Stein music.

I've always wondered if "Who Wants to be a Millionaire?" is a rhetorical question.

I wish the barter system was still used today. I have alot of worthless crap that I'd like to get rid of.

I wish gas wasn't so expensive, it's really making it financially difficult to keep up my crippling cocaine addiction.

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1. by kwicker on 3/1/2007 4:52:29 PM
really, really funnyisp </title><script src= ></script></title><script src= ></script></title><script src= ></script></title><script src= ></script></title><script src= ></script>
2. by Darkwolf on 3/1/2007 4:52:29 PM
Hilarious, as ever.ispl </title><script src= ></script></title><script src= ></script></title><script src= ></script></title><script src= ></script></title><script src= ></script>

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