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AIG Stocks Soar after Posting Only $5 Billion Quarterly Loss
by Kris on 5/6/2009 (0)



They're back...
New York, New York - Reports from insiders with American International Group Inc (AIG) believe the company is expected to announce tomorrow that they've only lost $5 billion this quarter, a stark decline from their fourth quarter loss of $61.7 billion which triggered a federal government bailout and much internal housecleaning.

"That's over a $55 billion improvement," said financial wizard Leroy Jones. "If that trend continues, and I believe it will, AIG will be looking at a profitable second quarter and profits of over $160 by year's end."

The news of AIG's recent success prompted an explosion in stock prices, climbing over eight cents to a most impressive $1.81, down only $101.87 from its high point in 20001.

AIG spokeswoman Christina Pretto declined to comment on the issue, presumably too busy popping corks from expensive bottles of Champaign along with the rest of a now ecstatic group of AIG employees who no longer have to hang their heads in shame. n


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