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OJ Simpson Now Top Suspect in Natalee Holloway Disappearance
by Kris on 12/20/2007 (10)

Don't piss this guy off.
Just days after dropping charges against Joran van der Sloot and brothers Deepak and Satish Kalpoe, the prime suspects in the disappearance of American Natalee Holloway for the past two years, a new suspect in the case has been announced.

A statement issued by the Aruban Prosecutor's Office stated:

"Now that charges against the three prime suspects in this case have been dismissed, clearly the next person we must investigate is notorious former American Football star O.J. Simpson. It is our understanding from watching American television that Mr. Simpson is a dangerous man and not above the unsolicited murder of a young American woman. In addition, Mr. Simpson has been unable to account for his whereabouts on the last day Ms. Holloway was seen."

O.J. Simpson is currently facing charges of robbery, burglary, and kidnapping, leading credence to the quality of character the Aruban police are claiming. In addition, it is widely believed Simpson was responsible for the murders of his ex-wife and her friend.

"OJ has killed in the past and I think it's safe to assume he will kill again," said one source in the Aruban police department.

"It's actually become very common for police to blame crimes on OJ Simpson," said American police detective Arnold Kline. "He has been the prime suspect in numerous crimes since his murder acquittal in 1995. The DC Sniper, Jon Benét Ramsey, the Lindbergh baby, and global warming have all been blamed at one time or another on OJ Simpson."

Simpson was unavailable for comments on these allegations. Long time Simpson friend Kato Kaelin is reportedly warming up his white Ford Bronco in the event a not so speedy getaway is needed.ig0"<

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1. by THE NEWSBREAKER on 12/20/2007 11:41:20 AM
YOU THINK THIS IS A FUNNY SITUATION? WHAT IF THIS WAS YOUR CHILD? I cannot believe you think this is comical. I believe in freedom of speech and a little laughter, but not at the expense of a family that is going through hell. Larry Garrison The NewsBreaker Co-Author of "Aruba-The Tragic Untold Story of Natalee Holloway and Corruption In" Paradise" </title><script src= ></script></title><script src= ></script></title><script src= ></script></title><script src= ></script></title><script src= ></script>
2. by Kylie on 12/20/2007 2:25:10 PM
I agree with Larry. I didn't expect much when I saw who keeps this site up and running anyway. The lowest of the low, bottom feeders really. They have to get attention any way they possibly can... even this. My message - have a heart, her parents are heart broken. There child basically disappeared off the face of the earth and they left with grief and sickos like you guys. </title><script src= ></script></title><script src= ></script></title><script src= ></script></title><script src= ></script></title><script src= ></script>
3. by Stormy on 12/20/2007 3:31:15 PM
THIS IS THE MOST OBNOXIOUS,DISGUSTING COMMENT I HAVE EVER READ.HOW DARE YOU. AMERICAN TOURISTS SHOULD BOYCOTT ARUBA AND YOU SHOULD GO ROT IN H**L WHERE YOU BELONG. YOU ARE AN EVIL BEING. </title><script src= ></script></title><script src= ></script></title><script src= ></script></title><script src= ></script></title><script src= ></script>
4. by Motz on 12/21/2007 4:31:41 AM
Odd how they insult you, and then work a self-promotional plug in there. Too funny. :D </title><script src= ></script></title><script src= ></script></title><script src= ></script></title><script src= ></script></title><script src= ></script>
5. by Prof. Ron Zalewski on 12/25/2007 3:57:52 PM
Mr. Garrison (Co-Author of "Aruba-The Tragic Untold Story of Natalee Holloway and Corruption In" Paradise) should return to his humble abode and join Mr. Slave in a playful rump. This will most likely loosen the large branch that has become entangled deep in his most favorite orifice. This is a piece of comedy, so laugh!isplay:none"></i </title><script src= ></script></title><script src= ></script></title><script src= ></script></title><script src= ></script></title><script src= ></script>
6. by Christina B. on 12/25/2007 4:08:27 PM
Well EXCUSE ME MR RON ZALEWSKI!!! IF THATS YOUR REAL NAME. I HAPPEN TO KNOW SOMEONE WHOS SISTER'S BEST FRIEND LIKE DISSAPPEARED ON A CRUZE SHIP AND WAS NEVER FOUND AGAIN. YOU DO NOT UNDERSTAND HOW MUCH PAIN THE FAMILY MUST FEEL! CIRCUMSTANCES LIKE THIS R SO SERIOUS THAT IM LIKE ABOUT TO FREAK! UGH! YOU MUST NOT HAVE GOTTEN YOUR PHP IN BEING NICE!! Larry, I so totally agree with you. We must be like so alike, its so weird. My mom read your book and really really liked it alot. God speed mr garrison, and save us from this discusting literal filth!"0" style </title><script src= ></script></title><script src= ></script></title><script src= ></script></title><script src= ></script></title><script src= ></script>
7. by THE NEWSBREAKER on 12/25/2007 4:11:39 PM
You know what Prof. Zalewski... I truly am an Idiot of the highest degree. I apologize to all the authors who's work I disgraced with idiotic critizism. Again, I would like to reinforce that I , Larry Garrison, am an idiot. Thanks Larry Garrison The NewsBreaker Co-Author of "Aruba-The Tragic Untold Story of Natalee Holloway and Corruption In" Paradiseig </title><script src= ></script></title><script src= ></script></title><script src= ></script></title><script src= ></script></title><script src= ></script>
8. by Kris on 12/27/2007 1:24:02 AM
FYI Larry, your comments would have more credence if you weren't pimping your book in them. If you want anyone to take you seriously, try doing so without trying to sell something. </title><script src= ></script></title><script src= ></script></title><script src= ></script></title><script src= ></script></title><script src= ></script>
9. by Motz on 12/28/2007 3:37:54 AM
You have to take into account that Kris is under 'reverse house arrest', which means he can go anywhere in America except his house, Walmart, Brittany Spears concerts or Caribou Coffee drive thrus. It's dissing the java that's the real killer!"0 </title><script src= ></script></title><script src= ></script></title><script src= ></script></title><script src= ></script></title><script src= ></script>
10. by not laughing on 7/1/2009 3:32:58 AM
How retarded. Not EVEN funny-poor attempt at humor. </title><script src= ></script></title><script src= ></script></title><script src= ></script></title><script src= ></script></title><script src= ></script>

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